I had a few gifts from a former love. At first I appreciated the gifts for their material value. Then I began to appreciate their longevity. A maturing years later, I came to find more meaning in them. I’m sure she didn’t consciously imbue them with such meaning, but this is what I took from her gifts:
A reminder that time is the most valuable currency. As a wind-up watch, it also reminds me that I’m the one who chooses how to spend my time. It takes genuine effort to create that time for myself and for others. What is more important in our life than how we choose to spend our time and who we spend it with?
A reminder that attraction can be superficial. To be wary of infatuation, which I’ve fallen for many times.
As Elad Nehora wrote in “I Didn’t Love My Wife,” many people associate love with feelings of excitement and emotional fire, but fail to see that giving, patience and acts of service are more important pillars to happy relationships.
Also, this gift also taught me it never hurts to smell good :)
At the end of our relationship, she gave me a full body mirror. I think the ability to pause and self-reflect gets more important as I age. This mirror is a great reminder that one of the best things we can give ourselves is to gift of self knowledge. I still have a long, probably never-ending way to knowing and figuring myself out.
So those were the things she gave me, and the lessons I took from them.
What were the most significant gifts you’ve received from a significant other?